.Final Thoughts.
I can't believe this incredble journey Levi and I have been through together. And it all ends and restarts tomorrow! It doesn't feel like it really should have gone by this quickly. I am trying to wrap up all my final thoughts before tomorrow and I am having brain fog. I don't even know how to explain how I feel exactly. I even tried explaining it to Levi and I couldn't...Pregnancy had it ups and downs that is for sure! But to be completly honest, I was grateful for it every single day. From the day we found out we were pregnant I decided that I was going to be positive the entire time. Even if anything were to happen along the way, or when I knew it would be hard. Why? Because of my sister Christy. She has been the #1 reason I have chosen to laugh when it hurts and smile when I wasn't happy. She was and is my best supporter (besides Levi of course), even though I know how hard it has got to be on her. I don't think I would have been able to do this without her. We grew closer this year and words cannot describe the blessing that alone has been for me. She has become one of my best friends. One of my favorite things to do this pregnancy was go over to my moms on days I didn't work and hang out with my mom and her all day. (and of course all of our Last Chance runs together). So thank you Christy, I don't think I could ever tell you this in person without crying, so I hope you're read this! Love you.
Everyone has been telling us how our world is going to be flipped upside down, how hard it is going to be and that we should live up our last days as the "2" of us. And I believe all you, but just like my pregnancy, I am choosing to laugh when it's stressful and when I want to cry. I know there will be long days and nights and that it will be a challenge, but I don't think me becoming a mom or Levi becoming a dad could have happened at a better time for us. Do I still get anxiety when I hear a newborn cry, of course. But the support we have with family, friends and ward members makes me know that we are going to be ok. One of the best texts of encouragment I got today was from my sister Hillary's SIL, Kelly. She has twins who are 8 and in her text she said "You really cannot imagine the incredible amount of joy these little babies are about to bring you. It's going to be a whirlwind of emotions so cut yourself some slack (she knows how hard I can be on myself) and savor this amazing experience. Twins are a unique privilege from our Heavenly Father but they are NOT for the faint of heart. As parents of multiples we're kinda special, as I'm sure you've seen and will soon fully grasp". I know I can do this, and I am ready.
I have been reading Baby Wise and Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Twins on how to grasp the schedule of eat-play-sleep. I really enjoy the organization of it all, because I have a slight OCD with being organized so reading these books has given me hope and I am excited for the challenge.
I am becoming a mom tomorrow of 2 beauiful babies, a son and a daughter. It's 10:30pm and I have to be up at 4am to get myself ready to be to the hospital by 5:30am. I do not have an ounce of tiredness in me, all I can think about is how natural this all feels. Becoming a mom is a natural feeling for me I guess. I don't know if it's because I have 29 nieces and nephews I've grown up with or what, but I now know my final answer of when people would ask me if I was ready and I didn't know what to say at the time...but my answer is "It all feels so natural and I am ready".
Less than 9 hours. Tomorrow is going to be one of THE best days of my life, and I wouldn't want to experience it with anyone else by my side but Levi. The past few weeks I have slown down a ton, and Levi has truly surprised me with how willing and helpful he has been. He has proven himself once again on being the best husband. Recovery isn't going to be easy but I know how hard of a worker he is and how much easier it will be on me having him there.
Tomorrow is also my mom's birthday. I got to choose the 3rd, 4th or 5th to have my c-section and the 4th it is! I couldn't figure out a more perfect gift to give my mom than Twin Grandbabies! So Happy Birthday Mom! Thank you for helping me out so much with this pregnancy and helping me get situated with everything. From my nursery bedding, to burp cloths and blankets, to helping me stay calm and keep positive thoughts about what I am getting ready to go through. I love you and hope tomorrow is the best for you!
